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A Better Me

Before continuing reading this, will you please stop for a while and answer my question:

“Are you in a relationship with someone who demands a change from you?”

Okay. Saya akan ralat pertanyaannya.

“HAVE you EVER BEEN in a relationship with someone who demands a change from you?”

Hey, stop right there. Saya nggak bicara soal perempuan-lelaki, yeah, girlfriend-boyfriend kind of thing. Saya bicara tentang ‘Someone’ yang artinya seseorang, who could be anyone. Siapa aja? You tell me! 🙂

Bisa sepasang orang tua yang sedang menonton televisi di ruang keluarga rumahmu, right here, right now.
Bisa seorang sahabat yang baru saja berbagi gossip via ponsel yang sekarang biayanya semakin murah karena persaingan antar provider selular.
Bisa adik kecilmu yang sedang mengintip layar komputermu dan kamu usir dengan galaknya karena kamu takut adikmu melihat ‘your special window’ yang menampilkan gambar ‘tidak jelas’… (ah, tahu lah maksud saya… hehe)
Or even your wife… your husband… your partner in life… who’s now making you tea and preparing for dinner…
And yes.
Boyfriend.. girlfriend.. someone who drives you crazy when he/she’s out of your sight.

OK. Now everything’s set.
Sekarang, please, jawab pertanyaan saya tadi: HAVE YOU? Continue reading

Insanity

Pernah merasa ini:

waiting for someone’s calls… news… wondering whether he/she’s okay… so afraid that something might had happened…

but then that someone’s giving you the short notice,
and somehow, it doesn’t please you at all?

Pernah akhirnya merasa:

why do I even bother to worry? to think? to spend my time wondering around like crazy?
when at the same time, that someone just laughs at you and thinks that you are overreacted.
Sehingga membuat kamu merasa menyesal telah menunggu kabar darinya?
and wish that: ngapain sih ngabarin? ngapain sih nelepon? ngapain sih ngasih tau? Kalau akhirnya cuman bikin kesel…….

This is my lifetime insanity.
Dan saya belum tahu, rumah rehab mana yang bisa menyembuhkannya….

Catatan Harian

January 2009
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